Like A Sailor, I Tell Ya!

Dear Snarky Mom: I have the worst potty mouth. How can I stop cussing in front of my kids? They are starting to pick up on my bad habit.

~ Meg

Dear Meg:

Well fuck, Meg, kudos on the inventive name. You are definitely going to have to get a bit more creative if you want to be able to take your kids out of the house. I, myself, have quite the "potty mouth." People have suggested snapping myself with a rubber band or putting a quarter in a jar every time I cuss. The problem is that being snapped with a rubber band totally makes me cuss more, and I am forever raiding my son's piggy bank for the parking meters at the airport. The best way to teach yourself to quit cussing is to hear the shit come out of your kids' mouths at their grandparent's house. But, that's not great parenting advice. Some of my friends have come up with words they can use as substitutes. This only works if the words are as fun to say as the cuss words. One friend actually says, "That's a cuss word." I like to say "bulbous" or "egad." Also try saying a regular words in a cartoon villian's voice. That probably won't work, but it would be funny as hell to hear.

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